It’s a common worst-case scenario for many students aspiring to college: you’ve worked diligently throughout high school to earn top grades and aced your standardized tests. All your studying and those extracurricular activities are finally paying off — you’ve been accepted to your dream school. The problem is, says John Tillman, president of the financial aid planning firm Ecliptic Financial Advisors, there’s no way your family can afford it.
It’s a situation that can cause anguish for everyone involved. “As a parent,” he says, “you’re in a situation where now you have to have a discussion about a budget when the student has already gotten excited about being accepted.”
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It’s no secret the cost of a college education has ballooned. In the United States, one year of tuition and fees at an in-state public college ran students an average of $10,662 during the 2023-24 academic year (that total ratchets up to $23,630 for out-of-state students); private schools cost $42,162 per year on average. Over half of graduates from public and private four-year institutions walked away with debt in 2022. On average, students with a bachelor’s degree graduated with $29,400 in debt.
Stress due to high student loan payments can have negative impacts on young adults’ mental and physical health. Paying back loans can hamper you as you try to jumpstart a career and may take precedence over saving for retirement, too.
Even if you or your parents have little to contribute, getting a college degree is possible without taking out massive loans. In order to side-step future financial stress, students and their families should take a clear-eyed, pragmatic approach to paying for college that starts well before acceptance letters hit the mail, experts say.
Determine a budget as soon as possibleIdeally, parents will have begun saving for their child’s college education from the moment they’re born, Tillman says. Three-quarters of college families relied on money from parents to cover the cost of college, according to a recent Sallie Mae and Ipsos study, followed by scholarships and grants. But saving for a child’s education may be unrealistic for some families. Depending on your circumstances, parents — or the student themselves — may want to start setting money aside for college by the student’s freshman year of high school, Tillman says.
Whether parents have been saving for years or not at all, they should have a conversation with their child before the end of their junior year of high school about how much money they can contribute, says Brendan Williams, vice president of knowledge at uAspire, a nonprofit that helps students from underrepresented backgrounds access financial aid and navigate higher education.
Parents and their children should be on the same page about how much money each party has available to pay for college, how long the student anticipates they’ll be in school (will they complete a four-year degree or go on to get advanced degrees?), and if they will get a job while in school. That way, the student has an idea of what schools they can realistically afford — and they won’t waste time applying to those they can’t.
Parents and their children should be on the same page about how much money each party has available to pay for college
For example, private schools are typically more expensive than public universities. The student might also consider attending a community college first and then transferring to a state university to save money. “You’re saving 35 to 40 percent off the full cost of the four years of school,” Tillman says. “So it’s a very effective way to reduce the overall cost of college.” If the student wants a certain college experience — dorm life, dining halls, and a sprawling campus with fancy facilities — they’ll have to weigh whether these features are worth the possible debt.
Williams suggests researching schools’ financial aid programs before applying. Each school has a net price calculator on their website (the US Department of Education also maintains its own database where you can search schools’ net price) where prospective students can enter information about their family’s finances to find out what students from similar backgrounds paid per year, including financial aid and grants.
Be strategic when applying for aidStudents also should apply for schools where they have a strong chance at receiving merit-based financial aid, Tillman says. Scores of schools offer at least some merit-based aid — that is, scholarships awarded based on your grades, leadership ability, or sports and artistic talents. For instance, over half of students at the University of Denver receive non-need based aid during the 2022-23 academic year. Some schools consider every student who applies for merit scholarships, but others may have separate applications.
Schools also usually list the GPA, SAT, and ACT scores of the middle 50 percent of students admitted to the university. For example, the middle 50 percent SAT range for accepted students at Towson University in Maryland is 1100–1300. If your scores are above these ranges, you’re more likely to receive merit-based aid, Tillman says.
Aside from merit-based aid, many students will qualify for need-based financial aid, which is based on your family’s financial situation. The Free Application for Federal Student Aid, or FAFSA, is how students apply for federal, state, and college financial aid. Fill it out as soon as you can after the form opens for the next academic year.
Aid is offered in the form of grants, scholarships, loans, and work study. On average, students received $8,890 in 2022 in federal grants. Usually, the FAFSA is available on October 1, but the form for the 2025-26 school year will be available on December 1. Some aid is awarded on a first-come, first-served basis, so the earlier you apply, the better.
There are also scholarships offered by private organizations that students can apply for beyond the FAFSA. Many students wait until they receive acceptances and financial aid packages to start applying, Williams says. However, there are more opportunities available at the start of the academic year than at the end, he says. Students should begin applying for scholarships as early as possible in their senior year of high school — and continue in the months following. Don’t discount scholarships from local organizations, like your school district or banks. You may have a higher chance of earning one because fewer students apply, Williams says. There are also more scholarship opportunities for incoming freshmen, he says, so don’t wait until your sophomore year to try landing scholarships.
Make a plan by listing all the scholarships you hope to apply for, when applications open, and the submission deadline, Williams says.
Consider your return on investmentThomas Caleel, the founder and chair of Global Education Opportunities and the former director of MBA admissions and financial aid for the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania, always tells students to think about the return on investment for a degree at a particular school. “If I’m putting my money into this education,” he says, “what am I getting out of it?”
“I personally don’t think you should go into this just thinking, ‘I’ll borrow whatever I need to borrow, I’ll figure it out.’ That’s a terrible thing to do.”
Students should think about what they hope to pursue after college and if a specific school can best support those goals, whether through a professional network, a unique program or other surprising benefit that will help you get ahead. For example, a California-based student who plans to go into real estate in their home state would get a higher return on investment at an in-state college versus an East Coast university. “It’s going to be much harder for you to leverage that network into a focus on real estate development in the Los Angeles County area,” Caleel says.
If you know you want to go to medical school or will pursue an advanced degree, you might have a higher return on investment by starting your education at a community college and transferring to an in-state school for your undergraduate degree, knowing how long you anticipate being in school, Caleel says.
Look at the big-picture costOnce students have gotten their acceptances and financial aid award offers — a document that shows how much financial aid, including federal grants, scholarships, and loans the college is offering — they can start comparing the yearly cost of each school.
First, look at the details of your aid package. Anything marked as a grant, you do not have to pay back. Federal Pell Grants from the US government are awarded based on the information you included on your FAFSA — the maximum award is $7,395 for the 2024–25 year. Loans are funds that must be repaid and accrue interest. Work study allows you to get an on-campus job to earn money throughout the year. The school will apply your grant and loans toward your tuition, fees, and room and board, while any extra money is paid to you directly.
While the net cost for each school you were accepted to may be similar, make sure to compare how much money in loans you would need to repay after graduation.
Try to avoid taking out private loans — money lent by banks and credit lenders and not included on your financial aid award offer — which tend to have higher interest rates. “I personally don’t think you should go into this just thinking, ‘I’ll borrow whatever I need to borrow, I’ll figure it out,‘” Tillman says. “That’s a terrible thing to do, and it puts students in a very bad situation down the road.”
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♬ original sound – Sade, Scholarship Strategist?There are other associated costs not included in the price of tuition and housing students should be aware of. Factor in how much you’ll need to spend on books, transportation to and from campus, and social expenses, like club memberships and off-campus meals, William says. There are also other incidentals: you might need to buy an air conditioner if you’re going to school somewhere much warmer than where you grew up or a winter jacket for somewhere colder.
If the cost of tuition for your dream school is just out of budget, you can try negotiating with the university, Caleel says. Collect documentation of financial aid offers from other schools, any changes in financial circumstances, like a parent’s loss of a job or medical expenses, and parent tax returns. The student should then email the financial aid office explaining how you’d like to negotiate tuition. “It’s best to get as many offers as you can and then go and say — and be honest here — ‘You are our top choice. But to go there, we need to pay $25,000 a year that we just don’t have, and our second choice is $5,000 a year. Can we meet somewhere in the middle?’” Caleel says. Sometimes schools will have extra funds for additional aid, but it’s hardly a given.
Although college is a considerable expense, it doesn’t need to be an onerous burden. Students and their families need to be realistic about the costs and shouldn’t discount lesser-known institutions.
“Parents want to be able to say, ‘My child is going to [the] big, shiny university,’” Caleel says, “when the smarter financial decision is for a child to go to a really, really good community college, to a really, really good state college, and save a ton of money.”
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